As a person with a mental illness, sooner or later you will automatically come across skills.
But what exactly can I imagine by that and what options do I have? I asked myself these and other questions and tried to answer them in a series of articles.


Table of contents of the article series

  1. Introduction
    The first part of this series is generally about skills, where they come from and into which categories they can be classified. There is also a list available for download.
  2. 5 senses or how perception affects us
    The second part of this series deals with the question of how strongly our feelings and thoughts are influenced by our senses and perception and how we can use them effectively for ourselves.
  3. Find the perfect skill
    In the third part of this series, I ask myself whether there is a perfect skill or whether we will always be on the lookout.
  4. My top 10
    In the fourth part of this series, I will go into more detail about my ten favorite skills and put together a top 10 for you.
  5. Emergency kit
    The fifth part of this series goes into more detail about the emergency kit and what exactly it is all about. In addition, I show examples of how to fill such a case.

Basics of Skills

Skills are not classic abilities that we can learn in the course of our lives, unlike the skills that we write on our CV during the application process. Within therapy, skills are referred to as tools that we can use to get out of difficult situations and do not cause any damage in the long term. That’s why I strongly advise against drug use. This should help in the short term, but causes great damage in the long term.

This type of training originally comes from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) and was developed to treat Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). In the meantime, the so-called skillen has become an important means of treating almost every mental illness.

Your physical tension varies from 0% to 100% depending on your stress level, your own assessment or other cause. By changing the tension, your thoughts and feelings also change. It is therefore important to know when you need help to regulate and what is good for you if you are stuck in a certain area.

It is also very important that you use your skills regularly so that you internalize them and, ideally, get relief very quickly. In addition, it may be necessary to replace old skills that no longer work well with new ones.

Einführung - Skills Teil 1 - Meditieren


Skills can be sorted into three categories. Each of these categories represents a certain level of tension. You have to find out for yourself which phase you are in so that you can also select the right tool in a targeted manner. I have put together a few skills for you below. There are no limits to your imagination for personal expansion of this list.


Very high tension, aggression, urge to harm yourself

  • Do intensive sports
  • Listen to loud music through headphones
  • To take a cold shower
  • Eat extremely acidic or spicy foods
  • Let the rubber strap on your wrist
  • Roll hedgehog ball over arms
  • Scent Sticks (Ammonia, Lavender)
  • Apply pressure to acupressure points
  • Call a trusted person or therapist
  • Use anti-stress balls
  • Go somewhere where you won’t disturb anyone and scream really loud


Tension, nervousness, calming

  • Go for a walk
  • Do sports
  • Go outside or into nature and actively take in sounds and smells
  • Take a bath
  • Smell fragrance oil
  • Use anti-stress toys
  • Do something creative
  • Play video games
  • Meditate
  • Do relaxation and breathing exercises
  • Praise yourself
  • Write a diary / diary of feelings
  • Solve a puzzle



  • Solve riddles
  • Bake or cook something
  • Give gifts to others or yourself
  • Listen to a radio play or read a book
  • Watch your favorite series or favorite movie
  • Make a pros and cons list



You can download a detailed list of skills from the following link.



My name is Chris and I created Slowlow Lobster.
I write posts about mental illness. Topics that affect me personally, but also topics that contribute to clarification and the end of stigmatization.